I can’t believe that I am 32… Here I sit and reflect on my life… Hmmmmmm It is Amazing the different phases I have gone through. I look back at my life and I couldn’t be more thankful for each and every situation that has occurred. It has all lead me to this point (and it’s a great point for sure). It’s all still surreal that I am living in Florida with my 3 kids and my partner in life… It’s absolutely crazy to think about. We are living this life that feels like a vacation most of the time. The fact that I can be like oh today I am feeling like I want to go to the beach and I can drive there with a short 20 minutes.
On to being 32… First I would like to say that I think internally and emotionally I am in the best shape of my life up to this point… I am running faster and longer, I am more patient (some days not so much). I try to focus more on the positives rather than the negatives, I look for good in people instead of bad. I am more in tune with my wants and needs and expectations. My heart is happy.
On to my appearance. I am happy with my overall appearance, I work really hard, like really hard to be mediocre and on some days that is a little hard to swallow… at the age of 17 I could eat a whole medium pizza by myself and didn’t gain an ounce and my skin was just tight… like really tight… hmmmmm, but I couldn’t run a mile without falling over and I didn’t know how to pick and choose my battles ha ha ha
There are times when I tell Josh to take a gander at me because this body will never be (this age plus these days again :))
Just FYI I don’t want to be 17 again. I am thankful for that time, but I am even more thankful for the absolute happiness that I feel now. There are things I wish I could get back like my Mom’s embrace. It’s funny because at this age, I have this perfect admiration for my Mother. She is such an inspiration to me… The fact is that she chose to love me… She chose to raise me to be the best person I could be. She taught me, she loved me, she disciplined me, and she embraced me. I often look up and just say, “Thank you for all that you did… then I will ask, “How did you not kill me?” Let’s be honest, I was an emotional wreck, with a very spoiled attitude… That’s okay. I am sure I was hard to handle. She did it!
I have grown as a Mother… At this age I am more sure of what is important for me to instill into my kids… I think at younger ages I had a need to follow what society teaches and not veer from that path… At this point I feel more confident and able to just parent in the best way that I can for my kids and not for what society thinks.(what works in our house may not work in yours) I feel at peace with where I am at emotionally as a Mom, I have a deeper understanding of my children and a deeper need to show them my love languages and teach them to understand that everyone has different love languages and that is okay. It’s up to us to embrace each one in a way that we can accept. It is so important for me to embrace them and allow them to find things in life that appeal to them not to me
Now this isn’t to say that someday’s my goal is to just get through the day… I have days where I am not as patient as a I want to be, I have days where I am not as loving as I want to be (I am human). I just want to throw it out there that days like today I kind of wanted to just run away… (well only for a short time) ha
I think it’s funny when people say, “The best is yet to come” I truly believe this statement! The best is yet to come. Each year life has gotten a little sweeter. I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that when we truly grow up we focus less on things we can’t change and more on things we can change. We also tend to focus more on our own flaws and not the flaws of everyone around us. We tend to focus on those that focus on us.
Through all the ups and downs things that were outside my control and those that were in my control everything was important to go through because I have learned important lessons in each situation that have/will help me in the rest of my life.
I am living my life! I am dancing my dance! I am laughing at my jokes! I am smiling at my reflection! I am letting my light shine! I am embracing yesterday, today, and tomorrow one at a time. (this is thanks to a few different people have always believed in me and loved me for me never expecting me to be anything different.)
I am blessed to be loved by an Amazing man that makes me want to be a better person. He brings out the best in me and pushes me to go farther and faster than I thought I could. In the short span of time that we have been together he has helped me reach goals that I didn’t think were possible before. (It helps that he is easy on the eyes)
I am embracing 32!
There have been so many exciting changes already!
Feeling: blessed, loved, and thankful