Perspective

Yesterday getting ready for church I was feeling a little overwhelmed with emotion… I was so frustrated with the bigs, and frustrated with myself because the house wasn’t picked up. I was overwhelmed with the schedule to follow for this week and I proceeded to just elaborate on all of the things that were so horrible or I thought were so horrible to Josh to let him know that it was going to be his job to get on the bigs about said frustrations…He is always the voice of reason and just told me to relax and enjoy Church… I told him I was going to really focus on praying for patience, but then as the kids and I were driving to church I began to pray for perspective… I just wanted God to help me to realize that I was maybe being a lot ridiculous… I was complaining because the kids rooms were dirty and I just didn’t understand why I needed to tell them 1000 times to clean them up… and just b la bla bla bla bla list goes on… So as I am asking for God to give me perspective I began to relax a little… I’m not sure if it’s because I was relaxing myself or because the sky was so beautiful or because the kids were singing or because I was getting closer to church, but maybe a combination of all things. We pull into the parking lot and I am just happy… The weather was beautiful they were setting up service to be held outside and the bigs and littles were playing at the playground and everyone was chatting and drinking coffee… There was laughter and smiles… The table that held the food was surrounded with people trying to get a snack. The bigs got out of the car to go and enjoy the festivity’s and I got Chandler out of the car I put him in my front pack carrier and we venture over I find a seat and just take it all in… “What a good day!” What a good God we have! Service begins and people are talking about joys they are experiencing and then some were asking for prayers and all of my petty complaints just became a thing of the past… All of a sudden Jacob comes over holding his arm and he is crying… There is blood coming from his mouth and I am at a loss… I take him to the bathroom to get him cleaned up we figure out there he cut his lip open, but his teeth were all intact! His arm was swelling got some ice and went back up to enjoy the rest of the service… About 20 minutes go by and he is still in a lot of pain… We need x rays. We rush to the ER and spend a good 4 hours waiting on results to find out that he has a buckle fracture. Not sure how bad because we need to see a specialist… I realized as all of this was happening that this was God’s way of giving me perspective…

Messy rooms and all that goes along with it… It’s all part of being a kid… Not picking up after oneself all part of being a kid… that’s okay because there will come a day when they won’t need me to help with those things… so why rush it. Why not let them enjoy the days they have as young kids… The days are shorter and shorter and the time goes faster and faster… So why not just enjoy it? I am trying to relinquish all of that need for everything to be in it’s spot and I am trying to really remember that once these days are gone and in the past all we have is memories… and do I want those memories tarnished with me ranting like a lunatic over and dirty room? I mean as I reminisce about my past I don’t talk about how clean the house was… I don’t care.