Food for thought truths

Why do we give and do so much for those that do nothing for themselves? Why do we give and do so little for those that do so much for themselves? hmmmmmmm

Why do we give and do so much for those that do nothing for themselves? Why do we give and do so little for those that do so much for themselves???????

Why is she asking these questions… they are absolutely ridiculous! Right, but aren’t they true as well.

Okay take this scenario for instance- There is a family of 5. Let’s say Mom, Dad, son, daughter 1, and daughter 2. Son basically goes through life and does as he is told, he follows the rules. He graduates high school and goes on to college with little to no help financially or really emotionally from his parents… He then gets married has a couple of kids and a wife. His parents see him and his family on occasion, but still don’t offer much help in the way of financially or even emotionally. Next we have daughter 1 she finishes school, goes on to get married and have a couple of kids. She works a couple of jobs and her and her husband do okay for themselves. They also do not receive much help in the way of financial compensation from said parents. Now, we move on the daughter number 3… She has gotten in and out of trouble for a long time, she doesn’t hold down a job, she has a few kids, all of which she sees on occasion. She then spends a good amount of her adult life in and out of jail because of choices that she decides to make. Her parent’s proceed to help her financially, emotionally, and mentally… Her mom is constantly driving to pick up her kids so that she can spend a couple of days a month with them, her mom is also constantly going to her place and taking groceries and little odds and ends of stuff… Her dad proceeds to pay all of her monthly bills including her child support so that she doesn’t get into more trouble… He even proceeds to purchase a vehicle for her. All the while children A and B haven’t received one cent from either one of their parents…

The parents justify it by saying, “well, they don’t need it like daughter 2 needs it.”

Let that sink in for a minute… “They don’t need it like daughter number 2 needs it” I guess I can see this point of view, but let’s look at it from another point of view… What incentive does son and daughter one have to keep working hard just to get buy… Why should they not just quit the jobs they have so that said parents can start to pay for everything for them? Basically we as a society continue to reward those that choose not to do for themselves and continue to basically punish those that choose to work hard for themselves.

Please don’t misconstrue my words… I believe that we all need a little help and deserve help… I’m just saying that as people do we continue to reward those that don’t do anything for themselves? Just because someone has worked really hard to get where they are doesn’t mean they don’t need a little help… Maybe if you are a parent and you are guilty of this type of action think about it like this… next time you give daughter number 2 100 dollars to just get by maybe you should consider giving son and daughter number 1 a hundred dollars to just say thank you for being awesome… That’s all…

I am guilty of this type of behavior as much as the next… I think we all feel like if we could just help said person a little they will start to help themselves… We all tend to reward too early with these types of people… They get a job and keep it for 3 days and we are celebrating, but the person next to us has had the same job for 15 years and we don’t say or do anything about it… it’s like we hold all these people in our lives to different standards. Why do we hold one child to higher standards than the next? Why do we hold one friend or person in our lives to higher standards, but then allow the next child, friend, or person in our lives to act and behave below those standards… maybe the only person you are hurting in that circumstance is the person that you are holding to lower standards. You are giving them an excuse to behave the way they do. You are enabling them to continue to act and do things at a lower set of standards.

Right or wrong… I don’t know. I just know that for me I get a little frustrated when i see people that continue to choose drugs or things over every thing and they get rewarded for staying clean for 5 days… or whatever I get a little frustrated when a parent chooses to abandon a child for that child’s entire life and then decides they want to show up once and every one praises that parent… Even the child. When you have busted your ass for most or all of said child’s life and no body says any thing about that. We as a society should stop behaving like we owe everyone every thing.

There is a reason I have high expectations for my kids… It’s not because I’m a bitch… it’s because I know the potential that my children possess. There is a reason that I have high expectations for the people that i allow in my life and my children’s lives… it’s because we deserve to be respected because we give respect.

Choose to have high expectations for your children! Choose to have expectations for the people in your lives. Choose to reward those that deserve rewarding… Pray for everyone.

The road of life is a long one… be prepared to understand that it’s not your job nor is it possible to fix everything. your job is to be the best person you can be every day.