What does the future hold?

A couple days ago our daughter Ashley had her 8th grade graduation. Crazy thing I can remember my 8th grade celebration like it was yesterday (down to the last detail). Watching this happen made me think back to the things that I thought I wanted, things that people wanted me to become, expected me to become… I remember feeling like a loser at times because I really had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up… I would spout off something that sounded good to my elders and school personnel so they wouldn’t think less of me. I remember getting asked the question, “Where do you see yourself in 5 years” this questions was a repeated question from the time I was an 8th grader until my last job interview.

Ashley has told us that this same question has been asked to her several times… My response… It doesn’t even matter… Your focus for right now is right now. I want you to have goals don’t get me wrong but there is no need to plan 5 years down the road. I found one of my all about me books from when I was super little like 2nd grade… It asked what I wanted to be when I grew up… HAPPY is what I put. I must have known something at that small age because that is the perfect answer. I want to be happy. What we tell our kids is that we want them to be happy. We want them to do things that will impact them in a positive way and make there little hearts happy. We are happy if they are happy.

I think sometimes we get to wrapped up the the career path, and amount of money, and the materialistic things… I can guarantee I don’t care how much money you make or the materialistic things that you acquire if your heart isn’t happy you won’t be happy. That’s not to say that you will always love the job that you hold or the things that your doing (there are times in life that we have to just get through different stages). At the end of the day you have to find your “happy” your “person” your “path” it can’t be a path that you think you should take.

I know that I have been down so many paths and that is just perfect because each one has lead me here! Each path was the right path for me at the time that it was taken. As we get older our thoughts and ideas change and we sort of just grow up when we don’t even realize it’s happening… Let’s not rush this process for our kids. I guarantee they will all make choices that we don’t agree with and they will all do things that later in life they will probably question at a later date and time… but that those are the questions they have to ask… They have to life the life they choose to live… As parents we have to just love them unconditionally and hopefully direct them down the safest path.

Have a 14, 10, and almost one year old… It’s strange to have kids in each impressionable stage of life… some days my patience is tested, and then I have to take deep breaths and remind myself that “this too shall pass” There are days that I look up and just thank my mom for loving me and I apologize for all the stress that I must have put her under… I thank her for being strict and teaching me respect. It’s funny because Ashley is so emotional and there are days where I just see so much of myself in her and I think man… Lord please give me strength (lol) Then there is Jacob and that boy being 10!! He is all boy… He tests my patience probably the most of all the kids because he is just always asking questions and always pestering me and always doing things that are just ridiculous… He always needs to know what we are doing, when we are doing it, and the time that it is taking place. Then there is sweet handsome boy Chandler who is about to be 1. This boy has such a strong will. He is so determined. We are really taking things day by day with him as we do with the older kids too, but with him we are just letting him develop on his own. Time goes too fast we don’t need to rush it. Although I am sure that he will be our orneriest child… I told him the other day that I had always asked God to give me patience and then he gave me you… hahah The sermon last week at church talked about how when we ask God for things he answers for instance you ask for patience he gives you something to teach patience you ask for strength he gives you something to be strong about… 🙂 I just hope that when our kids are older they can look back and say, “Our parents were always in our corner and showed us love in every situation!

I am beyond thankful that I get to be a Mom to three beautiful Amazing kids! I remember asking God what he was thinking giving me a child… I was crying and praying… now I thank him everyday for believing in me when I didn’t believe in myself! I don’t know what his plan is, but I know that he obviously knows what he is doing. 🙂 I feel extremely blessed to be able to share these amazing gifts with an amazing man that chooses to love me everyday… Not sure what I did to deserve any of this, but WOW!!